Posted by: Dr P | December 14, 2009

Twilight – New Moon

According to the folks who attended this film before I did, every screening was filled with screaming teenage girls. With that in mind, I hurried along as fast as humanly possible to the earliest showing I could. After all it’s been ages since I’ve been surrounded by screaming teens … well, apart from that incident down Bury baths anyway. And everyone was very understanding. Apart from the bloke whose sole purpose in life is to shout out “yellow wristbands, out in 5 minutes”.

Of course, I went to a 9.15 Monday night showing … no screaming girls at all, just a couple of groups of lads who were plainly there to perve at Bella, and a few couples who were plainly there because they couldn’t face going to “Paranomral Activity” or whatever the hot scarefest of the moment is. And a few people who, like me, are fans of the Twilight series. Actually, I’m a fine of twilight in general, in fact when the girl at the box office asked me if I’d seen twilight before, I said, yeah about 5 hours ago, it was rather pleasant … it’s no wonder I get barred from places.

Right. If you’ve not seen the first film, why are you reading this? I’m not going to go into detail about the backstory, other than to say, it’s about vampires – good and bad – and a girl named Bella who falls in love with one such vampire, Edward. Note EDWARD, NOT JEDWARD. Oh god, can you imagine? Mind you, Robert Pattinson’s hair is quite reminiscent of the demonic duo’s. There’s definitely potential for a whole comic spin-off here, but frankly I’ve not got the time or the energy right now!

It’s Bella’s birthday and she’s not really in celebratory mood. Her dad’s still the local police chief, and struggling to coem to terms with his daughter’s association with the vampiric Cullens. Meanwhile her best friend Jacob is hanging out with some local gangs, and is starting to develop some strange tendencies and even stranger hair – this really is a film in which the demonic ceatures are easily spotted – they’re the ones with daft boufants. In Jacob’s case, he looks like a girl (cue lots of raving from Jacob lovers).

Bella’s world comes crashing down when Edward announces that he no longer loves her and is leaving. Personally I think it’s because she keeps asking him to turn her into a vampire … which gets slightly annoying after the 10th scene in which it happens. Anyway, off he goes, the depression sets in, Bella retreats into her own world and several months pass. Jacob starts to become more overt in his advances towards our heroine but she continually rebuffs him.

And then the killings start. You’ll probably have worked out from the title of the film that the new gang in town is not another vampire clan but … a colony of mooners, who run round terrorising Twin Peaks, sorry Forks, by showing their naked bottoms (foolish in the winter months). Actually they’re werewolves, but if you’ve seen the trailer or not lived under a rock the past year, you’ll know that already.

It turns out that with the Cullens gone, Bella has become a revenge target for the vampire killed in the first movie by Edward. However, Edward keeps appearing in visions (it’s quite reminiscent of Obi Wan appearing to Luke in visions in the first Star Wars film) and keeping her out of trouble. Plus Jacob and his wolf buds turn out to be protecting Bella and her family, not stalking them. Hmmm.

I actually really liked this movie. Once again, Kristen Stewart is excellent – I think she’s a corking actress, and her chemistry with Pattinson remains believable and quite hot (although she acts the role well, whereas he tends to stare glumly and moodily around most of the time and rely on his obvious looks). However, the acting of some of the other cast members leaves a little to be desired. Jacob may look buff, and makes a good wolf, but his acting skills are also a bit of a howler.

There is also a classic cameo by Michael Sheen, who plays Aro, one of a celebrated vampire clan who are the only people able to deal justice to their own kind. They come into play when Edward believes Bella to be dead and asks them to sacrifice him. You may recall that Sheen played Brian Clough in the film “The Damned United”. It could have been utterly brilliant had Edward appeared in front of Aro and heard the phrase ….”Now, young man …” What a missed opportunity!

If you’re a Twilight fan, I think you’ll really enjoy this film. it has much more action and a deeper plot than the first movie, and the sparser appearances of Pattinson actually help the film. It is once again carried by the excellent Stewart, who puts in another fine performance as Bella. Plus the movie ends on an enormous cliffhanger, which is both fascinating, and really annoying!

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